Sadism and Masochism (S and M) in Intimate Connections

Sadism and Masochism (S and M) in Intimate Connections

The 50 Shades of Domestic Partnership

Dalya has a thought.

When we feel too much love for someone, have we asked ourselves if we are really in love or are we just addicted to the pain? An addiction to an exquisite pain of wanting someone so unattainable. That feeling that you wanted to be freed and yet you are chained and cannot be moved. Then I thought maybe, just maybe S and M can’t be defined solely through one partner whipping the other during an intercourse. It can also be categorized as an emotional relationship between two partners in an intimate connection.

An emotional sadist is someone who abuse their partners verbally, those who make decisions that could harm another or those who don’t think about their partners at all, emotionless. If someone belongs in any of these three categories, it can provide total torture to the other person in the partnership. This is the person who says “Love hurts. Love is never easy.”

On the other hand, an emotional masochist is someone who takes and longs for drama, for pain until the feeling of numbness is felt then it’s time to let go. Those who create issues and arguments in order to get the attention of the other person involved. This partner exhausts the other regardless of how patient the other one is. This is the person who says “If you love me, then why does it fucking hurt so much.”

Then I looked back on all the relationships of my friends and of myself, and it got me to think further that it does happen.  It happens in bizarre and trivial ways. Some may not be very transparent or others just simply choose to ignore them. Funny how the 50 shades kind of ways can be implied in an actual domestic partnership.